We now own an elephant

Yes, you read that right.
Followers of the @NJHallard Twitter account will be well aware by now that we are the proud owners of a shiny new, er, elephant!
I was on patrol with Al two days ago, around the outer perimeter of Cissbury Ring. The shift is always done in pairs, with one going clockwise, the other counter-clockwise as its just over a mile in circumference (unless you’re Dal, who does the whole lot on his own, on horseback in about two minutes). There is always a de-brief at the half-way point, where the two patrolling camp members meet up. Its usually a short meeting these days, as the zombies get thinner on the ground.
However, Al was telling me that there was not much to report when his jaw dropped. I turned round, expecting to see a horde of sulphurous stinkers making their way across the South Downs. But no, it was a common-or-garden elephant.
She was wandering serenely through the woods on one of the opposite hilltops. She seemed well-fed, and quite happy. There are a few zoos on the south coast of England, but they are a good distance away. One thing for sure is that elephants are not native to Britain! She must have bust out of a safari park or suchlike, maybe even on the day of the outbreak.
Now I am faced with a dilemma. As camp leader I have to mediate. Some camp members suggested we should let her go about her business. Some suggested we should keep her. Others, mindful of the approaching winter, only saw a thousand elephant steaks wandering about the countryside.
My own view is that we’re not short on meat, but we definitely have no vegetables to spare, especially for such a huge beast. But this is a democracy, of sorts, and I’m not the only one growing the vegetables or going hungry in the lean times.
I appreciate all feedback, especially from battle-hardened survivors of the zombie plague like yourselves. So before we decide whether she’ll be an eater or a keeper, I’d like YOU to let us here at Cissbury ring know what YOU think. There’s a poll below, and more elephant-related posts to follow:

About N.J. Hallard

N.J. Hallard was born in England in 1975. He lives with his wife and child on the West Sussex coast. He enjoys cooking and telling tall tales.
This entry was posted in Encampment update, Poll. Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to We now own an elephant

  1. Pingback: Tweets that mention We now own an elephant « NJHallard – Baron Cissbury -- Topsy.com

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